I was about to lose my wife of 10 years and go through my fourth divorce.
You see, I tried the Twelve Step Program no less than 10 times. I sought psychological counseling with five different psychologists not to mention one psychiatrist. I tried religion. My situation seemed hopeless and I was desperate. I sat at my computer and searched on sexual addiction and found your site. I took the interviews. I called you.
First, you helped my wife and I restore the foundation of our marriage.
Then you and I addressed my addictions to strip clubs, massage parlors, prostitutes, masturbation and pornography.
I have reached a point I never thought possible. My marriage is better than I had ever hoped it could be and I know how to keep it this way.
I no longer feel driven, controlled, or helpless to my situation. Joe, you have done something for me no one else has been able to do. I am 50 years old and have been trying to overcome this problem for 25 years. You have taught me how to regain control of my life.
There are good reasons for every principle in your approach. It makes sense. It works. Thank you for the happiness I finally feel in my life.
(Real name withheld)
I've been able to help people overcome addiction because through approaches I developed, I overcame four addictions:
a two- to three-pack-a-day smoking addiction
I started smoking when I was nine. By 14, I was smoking a pack a day. Fifteen years later I was up to three packs a day, feeling miserable, and constantly trying to quit.
Stop-smoking programs had sprung up across the country and I was willing to try anything.
I carefully looked into programs offered by private industry, charities, government, and universities. My research showed they didn't help most of the people who used them.
But my research had done me some good because until then I had not thought of using a program to stop; my attempts had been to "just do it." So, out of desperation, I went to work developing a program for myself.
Then I applied it. For the first time in my life, I was confident I had actually stopped smoking and felt good about it.
I realized that other people would want the same experience. So, in 1975, I made my program available.
Hardcore smokers who had tried everything for years successfully stopped with my program. Some came back and asked me to help them with alcohol and drugs.
I developed a program for them. It was so effective, I still use it today.
Some of the people I helped with alcohol and drugs told me about their sexual problems. That was how I came to the realization I was sexually addicted.
That did not shock me. Actually, I was glad to have put a name to a problem I had been struggling with since my teens.
What stunned me was the realization that if I did not overcome my sexual addiction, I would lose my marriage.
My wife and I had been together since 1977. We still are - happily.
I told her about my sex addiction as soon as I discovered it. She didn't put any pressure on me or make any threats. But I realized that if I did not overcome my addiction I would lose her.
It took me years to discover the information needed to overcome sexual addiction. She stayed with me because she saw I was honest with her and working at it. Her decision paid off wonderfully for both of us, and I don't mean financially. I mean true love.
Since 1983 I have been helping other couples and individuals deal successfully with sex addiction. One of the most important things I can pass on to you is: sex addiction can be overcome.
- You've just completed one of 12 chapters on how to stop correctly. If you'd like to start at the beginning, click here
- To download/print the first 48
chapters which cover additional topics like how to build intimacy and
restore trust and other crucial issues click here
- If you are a man in a relationship troubled by sex addiction, take this interview
- If you know or suspect that your partner is addicted to sex, take this interview
- If you lost a good relationship or never had one, take this interview
Copyright Joe Zychik 1999-2008. Attn. Webmasters, students and researchers and everyone else: Please obey fair use laws. Thank you.