The Most Personal Addiction

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You Have What It Takes To Stop Sex Addiction

Chapter 5

Anyone can overcome sex addiction

You've may have been told or may have felt that you don't have what it takes to overcome your addiction. This article will prove to you that you do. All you need is to be guided on how to use the valuable traits you have.

We're going to use qualities you've already developed to prove it.

Think about:

  • The people you love

  • The activities you enjoy

  • The work you do

  • The possessions you prize.

I'll bet none of them came to you overnight.

  • If you have solid relationships, you worked hard for them.

  • If you have a hobby, you worked hard to achieve your skill level.

  • You couldn't have developed a career without hard work.

  • You saved and worked hard to buy many of your most important possessions.

From these experiences you've learned that the best things in life are not given to you. You earn them through hard work. Overcoming addiction, or any other personal problem, is not given to you either. It's achieved through hard work.

 There are no shortcuts to self-respect, self-esteem, and self-confidence.

Read biographies of outstanding people and you will see one common trait: they persisted. They didn't expect it to be easy; they didn't expect anyone to do it for them; they knew that to achieve an important goal, you work hard and fail many times along the way.

Nature shows us that the stairway to success is built by the failures you learn from.

Notice how an infant learns to walk. The child fails many times, yet nature drives the infant to get up and try again, and again, and again.

As adults, nature does not think for us. We need to think for ourselves. But nature gave us the lead. It showed us that by learning from every fall, by keeping our eyes on the goal, and our minds directed toward achievement, we could succeed.

Everything you accomplished in life required going through the learning curve of setback and persistence.

Every difficulty you will encounter can be worked through successfully

Here's what to expect in the ups and downs of overcoming addiction.


The concepts you'll learn are not easy to grasp. You will make mistakes applying them. You can learn from your mistakes.


Feeling hopeless is not uncommon when dealing with addiction. Don't beat yourself up about it. Instead, remember that you do have choices and you can make your life better, even if you are still acting addictively.


You feel afraid that you won't make it. That's fine. It's expected.

You're better off admitting your fears and learning from them. I've overcome four addictions. None of them were easy to overcome and I was worried every step of the way. I'm still afraid of the destruction I can bring on myself and my loved ones if I start to believe "I've got it whipped."

I overcame them correctly; so, I don't live in fear of them. What I live in fear of is my own potential stupidity. I feel sorry for anyone who doesn't.

Difficulty is not doom. Difficulty is an opportunity to grow and become a better person.

Emotional exhaustion.

Sex addiction is the most personal addiction. In order to deal with it, you need to face your feelings, work through them, learn from them and then make new choices and take your life in a new, healthy direction. It's exhausting - and worth every second of it.

Don't expect yourself to be a Happy Face about it. You're going to feel drained and tired. That's fine. It's part of overcoming sex addiction.

Learn from every failure. Keep your mind on your goal. Don't expect it to be easy. Remember how hard you worked for everything else in your life. Apply that same effort to overcoming sexual addiction.

Through honesty, persistence and advice that works, your chances of success are excellent.

Menu: Home | The Most Personal Addiction | Sex Addiction Help | Porn Addiction | Masturbation Issues | Infidelity | For The Partner | Contact | Survey

Articles in this category

For The Man In A Relationship Troubled By Sex Addiction | Is He Sexually Addicted | Did you lose a good relationship or never have one? | The Key To Mental Health and Overcoming Sex Addiction | You Have What It Takes To Stop Sex Addiction | Stop Sex Addiction Here and Now Naturally | Rely On Yourself To Stop Sexual Addiction | Work With The Mind To Stop Sex Addiction | How To Be In Control Of A Sexual Addiction | How To Find Competent Help To Overcome Sex Addiction | Sexual Addiction - Why People Become Addicted | Sexual Addiction - Misconceptions To Avoid | Sexual Addiction and The Symptoms of Addiction | Why Sexual Addiction Is A Unique Addiction | How I Overcame Sex Addiction |

Contact Info

Dear Joe,

When I first contacted you, I had tried to quit "cold-turkey" many, many times before. After acting out my addiction, I would swear that this was the last time and I'm never going to do this again. But, as sure as the sun will rise tomorrow, I would be back to my addiction within weeks, if not days.

I contacted several people from sex addiction support groups. Every one had the same advice for me: Get into a twelve step program and start attending as many meetings as I possibly could. Well, that simply would not work for me. After I read your book, I called you, and after one conversation, I decided that I wanted you to help me.

Thanks to you, I am now able to have a normal, intimate relationship with my wife. I thought that I had loved her as much as I possibly could. But, during the counseling, I saw that my addiction was actually getting in the way of our relationship. I was indulging in this fantasy world that I had built up around me and I had little intimacy left over for my wife. Needless to say, this was having a negative impact on us not to mention making me feel guilty all of the time. Now, I'm more fully able to express my love for her, both emotionally and physically.

My work has improved as well, as a result of your counseling. I don't spend hours every day trying to appease my addiction. Needless to say, this has greatly increased my productivity at work.

For the first time in my life, I have hope. I can finally look at myself in the mirror and be happy about the kind of person that I am. I know, at last, that I am being true to myself; that I am being the kind of person that I always knew I was deep inside: a loving, faithful husband. For this, you have my undying gratitude.

Bertram [real name withheld]

If you would like to know more about how sex addiction is overcome, it will be my pleasure to spend a half hour talking to you and advising you about how to overcome your addiction at no charge.Whatever you tell me will stay in confidence. I will not try to make you feel guilty. I will not try to humiliate you. I will try to help you. Even if we never talk again, you will find that the time you and I spend speaking to each other will be beneficial to you.

You're welcome to call me at: 866-414-CONTROL (866-414-2668) 

Call 877-332-2869 if the circuits are busy (International calls: 805-214-1377)

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Monday thru Friday 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Pacific Time Ask for Joe Zychik

Snail Mail: Positive Realism 9732 Pyramid Way #327 Sparks, NV 89441

Please note:
THE BEST WAY TO CONTACT ME IS BY PHONE. I do not answer questions or counsel by e-mail. It is too impersonal. Thank you.

I am not taking in new clients at this time. If you would like to be on a waiting list, please call.

(International callers' FAQ click here)


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The statements made in the testimonials set forth in the book are made by individuals who have received personal counseling from the author and are based on the results of that counseling. The individuals were not compensated in any manner for the statements made. The original testimonials are in the possession of the author and may be viewed with the permission of the testifier and the publisher.

This book is intended as a guide to understanding sexual addiction and to suggest a method of overcoming it. The advice rendered by the author in this book is based solely on his experiences in over 38 years of personal counseling. The author does not guarantee any certain result to the reader of this book. The author and the publisher shall not be responsible to the reader or any third party for any action or inaction by an individual who attempts to apply the methods set out in the book. The author is not a medical doctor or a licensed therapist and does not pretend to be one. The materials on this website are protected by the author's first amendment right to express his opinions and are not to be taken as medical advice or advice from a licensed therapist.